My cat has the patience of a saint, I tell you.
Monday, I laid down for a nap because I was feeling like doggy doo. I laid the little two down with me(for those new to my blog, Alyce is 4 1/2 and Nano is 2 1/2). Obviously, as you’ll find out as you read further, I passed out fell asleep first.
Two HOURS later I woke up to my oldest (12 1/2) coming in from school. I heard him say, NANO! WHAT IS ALL OVER YOUR HANDS?
Then I heard a little voice saying, Nano did it.
Jordan said, ALYCE! IT’S ALL OVER YOUR HANDS TOO!
He walked further in the house and I heard OH MY GOSH! MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
I rolled out of my coffin sick bed, stumbled to the office area, where I just about died.
My poor black and white cat.
Now, I didn’t grab my camera, though, if I was a true digiscrapper, I totally would have, but I felt so bad for my cat I couldn’t waste time.
Damon, my sweet little cat, was covered in yellow. Not one piece of clean fur was on the cat’s body. Not even the part he was desperately trying to clean.
I moved on to the kitchen.
I seriously had to stop and breathe.
A whole 18-count carton of eggs smashed all over my kitchen floor. On my table, on the carpet in the family room, as I walked back out, I noticed more in different spots on my carpet in various rooms. Egg shells scattered here and there.
Went back out to the office and looked at Damon, looking at me, like you gave birth to them, I didn’t.
Now I understand why you had me neutered.
Seriously, who just sits there and lets kids rub egg all over your fur?
My cat.
I should be thankful that my cat has a very pleasant disposition.
Jordan attempted to pick Damon up under his pits, so as not to cover himself in egg, and took him to the shower.
Lucky us, our cat runs TO the shower when he hears the water come on. I’m not joking, this is a different day, but I have proof:
You don’t know how many times I go in the bathroom to find the cat in the shower with Jordan, or the girls, or attempting to get in the shower. Swear, he has fresh water all day long. 
Damon didn’t mind the water part at all, but he wasn’t fond of the shampoo, and Jordan has the scratches to prove it.
When the poor thing got out, he escaped from the towel, looked at me like, thanks, I now have NO dignity, and went to lick himself dry.
It gets better.
I was doped up on cold medicine when Pato got home from work.
I went and sat outside for a bit, thinking maybe the cool air would clear up my coughing.
Nothing abnormal happened.
I went back inside and went to bed.
Got up in the morning, opened the door to check the temp, and who comes shooting in the door?
Damon.
He snuck out past me when I went out the night before and spent the night prowling I’m assuming.
So thankful she turned out to be a he and he is neutered and up to date on his vaccines.
I felt so bad.
He probably thought he’d take off for my brother’s house and live with their cats after the whole egg incident, and then changed his mind because it was too cold, then no one opened up the door for him.
I’d feel worse if he hadn’t tried to escape again last night and tonight.
He has not learned his lesson.
Patience of a saint that cat has.
He’s probably wishing some nice old couple without children had adopted him now.
Have a great day!
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and having her stand at the edge of the street just staring at cars. It is funny. Drunk people at the town bar pee their pants.
