MOMMY’S INSTINCT
I was cruising blogs this morning, feet up high, yes everyone, semi laying down. I came across a blog of another mommy who was trying to make a decision regarding her son. Now, to some this might not seem like a big decision, but to another mommy, you could feel how she was feeling through her words.
I have come to the conclusion recently that when it comes to our children and things we feel strongly about, we need to go with our mother’s instinct. It’s rarely wrong. We tear ourselves up so much over decisions that have to be made because we worry that one of these decisions could be wrong, and it’s going to affect our kids for the rest of their lives.
I just went through this with my son Jordan. I took him off of his ritalin this summer and have decided to keep him off of it permanently. I did my research on the side effects of it. (Methylphenidate (Ritalin) – a background paper by the U.S. Department of JusticeDrug Enforcement Administration) and to me, no matter how little of a chance there is for one of the horrible ones to happen to my son there is, what if he is that 1. Would I care how small of a chance there was if I was one of the parents mourning their child from a ritalin related death? No, I wouldn’t. I took him off of it.
The school told me they were willing to “try” Jordan ritalin free, but that if he didn’t perform he would have to go back on it, ya di da. The publick school system is not the place to go on advice for ADHD. Which, I wasn’t, I was going for support in my decision. Between comments from the school and comments from his doctor, I started doubting my own decision to do what I felt was best for my son. Then I finally had to pull myself up and say, who is his parent? Who knows what is best for him? I don’t think it is the vice principal who just started this year at his school, or his dr who sees him once every 3 months, I think it is me, his mother, who is with him every day, who puts him to bed, who gets him up, who loves him when he’s hurt, who celebrates in his accomplishments. Why did I let them make me feel guilty?
So, I’m back to not doubting my decision, and I’ve come to the conclusiong that we moms have to trust ourselves and our ability to make good decisions for our children. No one loves them like we do, no one looks out for them like we do.
And on that topic, I have to post one more thing related to ADHD.
Characteristics of Gifted/Creative Children
*High sensitivity
*Excessive amounts of energy.
*Bores easily and may appear to have a short attention span.
*Requires emotionally stable and secure adults around him/her.
*Will resist authority if it not democratically oriented.
*Have preferred ways of learning; particularly in reading and mathematics.
*May become easily frustrated because of his/her big ideas and not having the resources or people to assist him/her in carrying these tasks to fruition.
*Learns from an exploratory level and resists rote memory and just being a listener.
*Cannot sit still unless absorbed in something of his/her own interest.
*Very compassionate and has many fears such as death and loss of loved ones.
*If they experience failure early, may give up and develop permanent learning blocks.
Gifted children may also withdraw when they feel threatened or alienated and may sacrifice their creativity in order to “belong”. Many children that we test exhibit a high IQ, but they often exhibit “frozen” creativity as well. Often there is an ability to express their feelings initially. We work to assist the child to become open, flexible and to be able to accept failure by developing higher frustration levels.
Amazing that many of these are the same characteristics of children with ADHD.
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